Recently Updated Stock Market Terms
- CEO — Chief Embezzlement Officer.
- CFO– Corporate Fraud Officer.
- BULL MARKET– A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
- BEAR MARKET — A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry, and the husband gets no sex.
- VALUE INVESTING — The art of buying low and selling lower.
- P/E RATIO — The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
- BROKER — What my broker has made me.
- STANDARD & POOR — Your life in a nutshell.
- STOCK ANALYST — Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
- STOCK SPLIT — When your ex-wife and her lawyer split your assets equally between themselves.
- MARKET CORRECTION — The day after you buy stocks.
- CASH FLOW — The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
- INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR — Past year investor who’s now locked up in a nuthouse.
